Chapter 2: How a Garbage Guy Destroys First Love

After finishing the script reading, we were walking down the outer corridor that ran through the courtyard.

Perhaps because filming was about to begin, we saw figures of men and women in discussion everywhere.

They were likely either business couples, bound by profit and loss, having their final meeting, or negotiating to find better partners.

“I’m not a fan of this atmosphere,”

Asuka Kurashina voiced exactly what I was thinking, and I nodded in agreement.

“Really? I kinda like it, though. It’s like a festival,”

“I wish I could be as positive as Ema,” Haruma mused, “Oh, excuse me.”

Noticing a group of girls gathered together, Haruma smoothly dodged past them.

Even though they were in the wrong, he didn’t forget to smile pleasantly. The girl members instantly lit up at the encounter with Bokusetu’s prince.

It wasn’t just my ego talking; we were drawing attention from everyone in the school.

The Bokusetu Four Heavenly Kings were all together. Of course, we’d stand out just by walking around.

The male members sent gazes like hungry dogs towards Asuka and Ema, the unattainable beauties, while the female members waved at Haruma and me, hoping for a chance.

But, unfortunately, the kind of developments they were hoping for were impossible.

Our relationships were complete within this closed world of these four.

I had the right to be liked like a lover by Asuka and Ema, heroines everyone admired. Though, that was just fictional affection depicted in the script.

As I was indulging in a bittersweet sentiment like a café au lait of superiority and emptiness, Ema stopped in her tracks, mouth agape.

“What’s wrong, Ema?”

“Aoshi, what do you think that is?”

Following Ema’s gaze, I saw an unusually large crowd gathered.

Focusing on the center of the commotion, I spotted a blonde-haired, blue-eyed half-beauty—Karen Emilia Kisaragi, already the talk of the school.

What was happening was obvious at a glance.

To rise to become popular members, the male members were sending fervent offers, trying to recruit the strongest helper, boasting otherworldly looks, into their group.

But it seemed no man had yet managed to win over Karen.

While being courted one after another by a line of handsome guys, Karen maintained her icy, expressionless face, cutting down the frivolous men like weeds.

In this paradise of youth where casual, flirtatious relationships spread like amoebas, Karen maintained a lofty aloofness, like a snow-capped mountain peak that wouldn’t allow anyone to reach the summit.

“She’s a strange girl, isn’t she? In a way we haven’t seen in Bokusetu before.”

“More than that, to my eyes, she looks like she has no interest in romance itself,” Haruma replied to Asuka, who was tilting her head in puzzlement.

“She’s on Bokusetu, so that can’t be true. Aoshi, go talk to her a bit. Let’s bring her into our group!”

“Huh? Why me?”

“Because seeing a girl like that become dere is the cutest thing.” (Dere is short for deredere, meaning lovey-dovey/lovestruck)

“You got an old man living in your heart or something?”

“But hey, Aoshi, don’t you think you should go talk to her?”

“Hold on, even Haruma, what are you planning?”

“Kisaragi-san looks like she might become isolated if things go on like this.”

If Karen was being taken advantage of due to her naivety, about to be used by some sleazy guys, I was planning to offer a helping hand.

But seeing her incredibly robust survival skills, that worry seemed unfounded.

“Enough, let’s just get into the studio already. Filming is going to start.”

Filming for the Love Rea part was done in groups.

The management explained that the selection of members was random, but that was a blatant lie.

In a studio smaller than the classroom used for homeroom this morning—about the size of a prep room—eight desks were pushed together.

Of those, seated at three were Haruma, exuding the aura of a king, Ema, livening up the place with her gal spirit, and me, dragging down the mood with my gloomy face.

This lineup couldn’t be a coincidence—completely as scripted, thank you very much.

At the season’s opening, we’d be searching for potential partners while chatting in a goukon-like atmosphere. (Goukon refers to a Japanese mixer party, a group blind date.)

Having thoroughly read through the script earlier, I was fully prepared to become a puppet.

If there was one concern, it was—

By some twist of fate, seated directly across from me was Karen.

As ever, her face, so perfectly sculpted it seemed fake, was devoid of any emotion.

If her inner self was as composed as her expression suggested, she was something else. It was a rite of passage for rookies to be extremely nervous on their first day of filming, after all.

While I was thinking about this, the lamps on the cameras surrounding us lit up.

In that instant, as if reinstalling an OS, I activated my Bokusetu persona.

In this mode, strength flowed into my facial muscles, and my voice gained resonance.

“Finally, the new season has begun, huh.”

“Wooo-hooo! Everyone, blame it on summer and fall in love!”

Making the first statement was an important first step in seizing control of the scene.

Furthermore, Ema chimed in, creating an atmosphere where my statement was approved.

“Let’s all do our best to find wonderful love,”

There, the star attraction appeared—Bokusetu’s king made a statement caring for everyone, setting the stage for the members to concentrate on filming with peace of mind.

As if agreeing with the flow we had created, two female members also spoke up.

“Like, Haruma-kun and Aoshi-kun are a given, but aren’t all the guys like, too handsome, seriously?”

“My hands are sweating from nerves, seriously!”

According to my research, there’s no program where the word “seriously” is repeated as often as in Love Rea.

“No way, no way. The level of girls this season is also crazy high, you know?”

There, a male member with a mushroom haircut spoke up with good timing.

“That’s, like, yay.”

“But, like, does my look even match with everyone else?”

“Matches, matches. I’m actually worried if I even look like a romantic interest.”

“Huh? Totally dateable, though.”

“Seriously!? Say it one more time! I want to feel good!”

“What’s with that, so funny!”

The atmosphere warmed up, and immediately, self-deprecating yet cute appeals from the female members and litmus test checks from the male members to see if they had a chance flew back and forth.

It was cringe-inducingly flirtatious banter, but this was Bokusetu’s daily scene.

While plastering on a business smile to not ruin the visuals, I glanced in the direction where a chilly air was emanating.

Karen was maintaining her silence, like a doll displayed in a shop window.

She showed no sign of trying to interact with the members. Rather, an aura of “don’t talk to me” like a blizzard was raging around her.

What did this girl come to Love Rea for?

Well, if Karen was going to remain a decorative piece, it would be easier to keep things from getting chaotic.

“Should we talk about first impressions soon? The ‘announce how many members you’re interested in’ thingy!”

Ema proposed, raising her hand cheerfully.

It sounded like she’d just come up with it, but I knew it was a calculated statement.

Ema Shinkai, the player, was born with looks to be loved by everyone, and moved Love Rea dynamically with her gal spirit.

Thus, she had climbed to become a unique existence called “the genius of youth.”

There was no way the order of such a popular member would be refused, and the members also showed their agreement.

For people who don’t watch these kinds of programs, it might not click, but in Love Rea, not touching on first impressions is like progressing a novel without revealing the protagonist’s name—an incredibly unkind act.

If first impressions aren’t revealed, viewers won’t know who is directing their arrows of affection at whom.

The announcements would be made clockwise, starting with the proposer.

Ema, as if switching her mental switch, looked down for just a moment—

“—Right now, maybe two people.”

At Ema’s sudden transformation, everyone present held their breath.

Completely changed from her boisterous impression just moments ago, she cast a sidelong glance at Haruma and me while looking down at her nails, appearing perfectly like a girl in love.

As ever, this girl was too good at making emotional expressions.

“Hehe, kinda embarrassing. Okay, next is Haruma—”

“One person, I guess.”

It was an immediate answer that was almost rude for the always gentlemanly Haruma.

Haruma’s gaze was fixed solely on Ema, as if they had been transported to a world of just the two of them.

The moment I perceived that, the Bokusetu persona within me completely took over my body.

“—Wait a sec. Can I go next?”

I cut off the flow of announcing the number of people they were interested in, which had been going clockwise.

Though I took the form of a question, I wasn’t seeking a reply. I continued speaking without a pause.

My instinct was telling me—if I missed this moment, I wouldn’t be able to fill the studio with the atmosphere of youth.

“I’m the same as Haruma.”

In the script, Aoshi Fudo in this scene was only supposed to announce “one person.”

Of course, that “one person” was referring to Ema.

But now, that kind of commonplace acting wasn’t going to cut it anymore.

Because both Ema and Haruma had, right from the start, thrown in ad-libs that surpassed the script.

That’s why I interrupted the order of announcements and even went to the trouble of mentioning Haruma’s name to declare the person I was interested in.

To play the role of a high school boy who couldn’t stand still, feeling like he was about to have Ema snatched away by the flawless prince.

The cameras filmed as if they had been waiting for this—a sign of a love triangle.

This is how we act out lies as naturally as breathing.

Not reflections of fresh teenage hearts, but using meticulously calculated techniques to try and depict a youthful image that would burn into someone’s heart.

And, what we were selling wasn’t just a sweet lie.

It was a lie that was as close to the real thing as possible, to deceive millions of eyes waiting on the other side of the camera.

That’s why, during filming, I would genuinely start to like Ema and feel rivalry towards Haruma. While deceiving even myself, so as not to be aware that I was being driven by false emotions.

While the announcements continued clockwise, the turn of the problem child arrived.

“Kisaragi-san, how about you? Is there anyone you’re interested in?”

Being addressed by a male member, the blonde hair around Karen’s mouth trembled slightly.

“I’m not interested in anyone. Zero.”

—Wait, what did she just say…!?

As I said before, Love Rea, where men and women actively trying to fall in love gathered, was a rational game. Strategies existed to advance the game favorably.

Responding to first impressions was the prime example of that.

Even if there wasn’t a member who particularly captivated you, the Bokusetu theory was to tentatively name someone you were interested in. You could accept anyone who came your way, have interactions, and then later, carefully select relationships you wanted to continue from the mixed bag.

Furthermore, if you declared you were interested in zero people, the guys would realize there was no chance and withdraw, making it difficult to connect to future developments.

Karen’s actions were completely incomprehensible.

Even if you appealed that you were keeping yourself pure on Love Rea, there was no benefit—this was, yes, it was a move as if she had decided on one person in her heart.

As if it were something you shouldn’t touch, Karen’s statement was glossed over.

“Okay then, the people I’m interested in are—guess who!”

“Ehh, what’s with that,”

At the female member’s words, I knew what was coming.

A pattern where, right after announcing the number of people they were interested in, they would also open up and reveal the names.

If you wanted to make a partner quickly, this technique had the best cost performance. From her attitude, it was obvious that her target was the male member with the mushroom haircut.

While harboring a lukewarm feeling, just as I was about to act to keep the scene from falling apart—

“—Instead of doing such roundabout things, why not just reveal the name?”

The warmed-up scene was exposed to arctic cold.

While touching on a taboo, Karen’s expression showed no ill will. She just looked like she had voiced a pure question.

But the female member who was called out didn’t take it that way.

“Huh? I don’t have any obligation to be told what to do, okay? And if you’re not motivated, can you just shut up? You’re just here because you have a good face, right?”

Ah-ah, freestyle rap battle starting.

“I’m not talking about looks right now, though? Or, if my looks are stimulating your complex, I’m sorry.”

“Ugh…!! What is with you!? Seriously creepy!”

Being calmly countered, even the female member’s expression twisted.

“I don’t want to be told off by someone who isn’t interested in anyone! If you don’t intend to fall in love, then go home!”

“It’s true, I did say I wasn’t interested in anyone. Because, having someone I like is enough, right?”

“W-what are you talking about?”

“No matter what kind of place Bokusetu is, I’m just going to stick to the reason I came here.”

Saying that, Karen stood up with a serious expression.

She boldly cut across in front of the cameras, walking while ignoring even the batteri that indicated member positions. (Batteri is likely referring to bami-ri バミリ, tape marks on the floor to indicate positions.)

I stared blankly at Karen, who was piling up rule violations.

For some reason, Karen’s sapphire eyes also locked onto me and wouldn’t let go.

And then, Karen, with her blonde hair dancing in the sunlight, stopped next to me.

“Fudo, Aoshi-kun.”

After calling my name, Karen fell silent, placing a hand on her chest.

I could tell at a glance that she was nervous. Just a moment ago, she had been like a snow spirit, with even her heart frozen over.

That’s why the outburst of human emotion was reflected so vividly, breathtakingly.

And then, in the next moment, color flooded into her peerless looks, which had never broken from their expressionlessness.

Eyes that seemed to be feverishly moist, cheeks tinged with pale pink, lips hesitating as if searching for words—from each and every one of her gestures, signs were overflowing to a maddening degree.

“I’ve even dreamed of being able to meet you here—my first love.”

“Huh? Huh? Huh?”

The words were reaching my ears, but my understanding couldn’t keep up.

But, like the changing seasons, Karen didn’t wait for me.

“I like you. Please make me your girlfriend.”

A confession like a carefully written love letter pierced my chest.

In a world where time had stopped for everyone but me and Karen, I finally understood.

…This girl is an idiot. An unbelievable, colossal idiot.

Ignoring the rule that confessions had to be made at the Bokusetu Sheet, the behind-the-scenes situation that I only did scripted love, even the adult expectation that you should want a process of getting to know each other before becoming lovers—she skipped over all of it—

Driven by pure love, like a summer shower.

In a school where price tags were attached to all kinds of youth, only Karen was here, clutching “the real thing” that she had no intention of handing over to anyone.

Foolishly wrong, yet just as much right.

That’s why she was shining so dazzlingly, probably.

“Hey?”

“……What?”

Being called out by Karen’s wistful expression, time began to flow again in the world.

“I want an answer to my confession.”

Answer? That was already decided.

I couldn’t go out with Karen. Absolutely, we couldn’t become boyfriend and girlfriend.

“Hey, you! What do you think you’re doing!”

Unable to just watch anymore, the floor manager barged in, face pale with anger.

He grabbed Karen by the shoulder and dragged her backstage.

“H-hey, let go! I haven’t heard Aoshi-kun’s answer yet!”

“Sorry, but I can’t let you monopolize the program any further. I’ll have you explain your intentions in front of the director.”

It looked like she was going to get a serious scolding from the principal. May she rest in peace.

“…What was that just now?”

In the scene as if a typhoon had passed through, the female member who had been angry just moments ago muttered blankly.

“Okay. Everyone, enough gawking.”

At that single voice, we snapped back to reality.

Despite the abnormal situation, Haruma maintained his cheerful smile and turned the conversation to the female member who had conducted the name-guessing game and the male member with the mushroom haircut.

“It seems like those two were mutually aware of each other, so why don’t you invite her for a tsuusho?” (Tsuusho ツーショ is short for two-shot, referring to one-on-one time/date.)

Tsuusho was an abbreviation for “two-shot,” a term referring to spending time alone together.

Not just in Bokusetu, but in any Love Rea program, the standard flow was to find members you were interested in at a group event, and then invite them for a tsuusho to deepen the relationship.

“Then, could you invite me, Leo-kun?”

“Okay. Leave it to me.”

Seeing the two who had just arranged their plans, Haruma nodded.

“Alright then, let’s resume filming. Director, camera crew, are you ready?”

Under the direction of the king who governed Bokusetu, the scene was quickly rebuilt.

The first to move were the two from earlier.

“Hey, Emi-chan. Wanna go for a tsuusho now?”

“Eh, me? Yeah, okay.”

The guy, having mustered his courage, the girl, flustered but unable to hide her expectations—wearing the sparkling atmosphere of youth, the two left their seats.

Bokusetu’s lies were just too beautiful. If you didn’t know the behind-the-scenes truth.

Starting with the two of them leaving the classroom together, tsuusho invitations rained down.

“Ema. Wanna go on a tsuusho with me?”

“If it’s Haruma, of course, I’m in! Let’s do our best!”

I looked wistfully at the backs of Haruma and Ema as they walked off shoulder-to-shoulder, looking friendly.

As the second-lead guy who had fallen a step behind his love rival, it was probably appropriate acting.

And so, I finished the first battle of the new season.

Waiting for someone to return from a tsuusho is one of the most empty times in the world.

Because while someone else’s romance is burning brightly, you’re just killing time alone, you know?

I didn’t feel like waiting for Haruma and the others to return, so I left the studio early.

Not to just kill time aimlessly. I had something I needed to do.

I made my way to the principal’s office—and waited in front of it until something happened.

Before long, emerging from the principal’s office was a girl with honey-colored hair dancing around her.

Her looks were so eye-catching that I knew in an instant that she was the person I was waiting for.

“Looks like you got a good scolding from the principal.”

“Ah……!!”

Noticing me, Karen canceled her ice queen mode and widened her sapphire eyes.

Perhaps it was because she had the audacity to make a guerrilla confession—it seemed she would only show her true face to me. It wasn’t like I didn’t feel a sense of superiority at that fact.

“What’s with that reaction, like you encountered a ghost or something?”

“It’s not like I expected to suddenly run into Bokusetu’s Aoshi Fudo.”

“That’s true. To summon me, a considerable fee is incurred, you know.”

“I see. I’ll remember that. So, how much is it?”

“Just kidding. That was a joke.”

Karen pursed her lips like a rabbit, tilting her head and saying, “Is that so?”

Seriously? I’d heard that humor was hard to get across to Germans.

“Um… were you listening?”

“To the principal’s lecture? No way, I don’t have that kind of hobby.”

At my answer, Karen breathed a sigh of relief, as if relieved.

I understood how she felt. No one wanted other people to know about them being scolded.

“Then, what business do you have with me?”

“Karen, you confessed to me, right? I thought I’d give you my answer.”

In an instant, tension ran through Karen’s beautifully shaped eyebrows.

“—Okay. Let me hear it.”

I thought, she’s a strong one.

Even though she probably sensed from the businesslike mood I was exuding that she couldn’t expect the answer she wanted, Karen was trying to accept reality.

Surely, this girl, born with the cheat-level existence of a half-beauty, had always reigned as a winner when it came to romance.

Even at this school, there was no man Karen couldn’t win over—except for me and Haruma, bound hand and foot by Bokusetu’s constraints.

Thinking that I would be the first to put dirt on Karen’s romantic history made me feel a little apologetic.

But, you’ll lament your lack of taste in men a little later.

“Giving you my answer here is kind of awkward, how about we change locations?”

“Yes. I don’t mind, but…”

Karen was easily lured in by a suspicious line that was on par with “Want to grab a coffee?” The weakness of being in love, huh.

Let me be clear, what I’m about to say is just a fact, and definitely not bragging.

The truth is, Karen isn’t the first fan who has rushed into Bokusetu as a member, with their feelings of love overflowing, to try and become my girlfriend.

Even if I rejected these oshi-kake girls’ confessions head-on, more often than not, they wouldn’t give up. (Oshi-kake 押し掛け refers to someone who forces their way in, like a pushy fan.)

They were fierce warriors who had broken through national auditions for my sake, so it was only natural that they were persistent. There was even a girl who once screamed that if she couldn’t become my girlfriend, she’d kill herself.

This half-beauty who was keeping a cool face right now also had the potential to transform into a troublesome fan.

“But, where are you planning to go?”

“I was thinking of going to the rooftop. The view’s nice up there, too.”

So, Karen—I’m going to make you hate Aoshi Fudo from the bottom of your heart.

The long staircase ended, and a plain door appeared.

The moment I twisted the knob, a sky blue so vivid it was like waking up filled my vision.

The rooftop was a refreshing vista, like it could be used to film a carbonated drink commercial.

Karen, who had stepped in after me, also seemed to notice the object that stood out conspicuously on the rooftop.

“Kyaa!”

I almost burst out laughing—Karen, she makes those girly noises too, huh.

Karen rushed towards it, her summer uniform fluttering, towards a bench that was decorated in yume-kawa style, like a run-down tourist spot desperately trying to create a lover’s sanctuary. (Yume-kawa 夢かわ is short for yume kawaii 夢かわいい, meaning dreamy cute, a pastel and generally “cute” aesthetic.)

That was the Bokusetu Sheet, the grand stage where members confessed to their destined lovers.

It was Bokusetu’s sacred place that had created countless famous scenes that colored the program, and on the other hand, for me, it was also the place of demise where I had an unwanted breakup with Asuka.

Karen was stroking the bench, muttering “cute, cute” repeatedly.

Seeing such an innocent side up close, I could truly feel that Karen, who appeared so mature, was also just a 17-year-old girl.

“Since we’re here, why don’t you try sitting on it?”

“Eh? Is it okay?”

“Does it say ‘freshly painted’ anywhere?”

Karen said, “Then—” and perched herself delicately on the edge of the bench, as if still hesitant.

“So, you’re a Bokusetu fan too, Karen.”

“Of course. Among girls who watch Bokusetu, there’s no one who doesn’t admire the Bokusetu Sheet. I’m even worried I might break the sheet by sitting on it.”

“Well, you pretty much destroyed today’s filming, though.”

Karen looked like she wanted to say something, but stopped herself, biting her lip.

She had probably been thoroughly lectured by the principal.

Even so, I thought I would give Karen, who would soon be a complete stranger to me, words of farewell as a Bokusetu senior.

“Hey, if you keep doing crazy stuff like that, you won’t be able to find a boyfriend, you know? Bokusetu filming, it looks like everyone’s doing whatever they want, but actually, cooperation is required.”

After speaking in one breath, I noticed Karen’s shoulders drooping.

My words might have been too harsh—I quickly tried to follow up.

“Well, maybe it’s harsh to tell someone like you to fit in with Bokusetu’s vibe, though. German culture is completely different, after all—”

“That’s not true. I’ve lived in Japan for a long time too, so I know the importance of reading the atmosphere. And that I should follow Bokusetu’s rules as long as I’m at this school.”

“……Huh.”

“What? Why are you making that surprised face?”

“No, I just thought you’d show a rejecting reaction, saying you didn’t want to do anything like lying.”

“I’m not that stubborn, you know.”

Karen looked slightly offended, twirling her honey-colored hair around her fingertip.

“For Germans, rules are gold. Even knowing that, I still ended up being a bad girl. Do you know why?”

“No idea.”

In the humid air of just-past-the-rainy-season, my reply probably sounded indifferent.

“—Liebe macht blind. If I translate it into an expression Aoshi-kun is also familiar with, it’s ‘love is blind’.”

The first German I ever heard sounded like a mystical magic spell. 

"The only one I've ever wanted is you, my first love from Bokuset—Aoshi Fudo. I want you so much that nothing else even registers." 

Such a pure confession.

There's not a trace of the over-the-top acting often seen in Bokuset, nor any of the self-consciousness about viewers that comes with being on a dating reality show. 

For Kisaragi, the only thing that matters is to honestly and directly express her feelings to the person she wants to reach.

That's exactly why I can tell Kisaragi is genuinely in love with me. 

Kisaragi, with her blonde hair blowing in the sea breeze as she waits for my answer, looks like youth personified. Just like a heroine from my favorite light novels.

I wasn't exactly displeased. To the point where I could even picture a future with her. It's time, I thought. I walked over to the bench and sat down next to Kisaragi.

"About that... could you give me a little more time to think it over?" Kisaragi was speechless. 

Of course she was. She wanted a yes or no answer right then and there. I know that, and I'm doing this anyway—to shatter the fantasy she has built up around Aoshi Fudo.

"It would be disrespectful to Kisaragi to give you an answer when I'm still unsure, right? How about we stay friends for now, and use that time to get to know each other better? What do you say?" Her wavering sapphire eyes seemed to be asking, "What are you playing at?"

That's right. Realize it, Kisaragi. You're about to become the most convenient thing in the world – a 'backup girlfriend.' You're disappointed, aren't you? 

Your stomach is churning, right? That 'first love' feeling that brought you all the way out here has gone cold, hasn’t it?

The person you're admiring is a piece of trash, born from a cesspool. 

I'm telling you, for your own good, hurry up and slap me or something and find someone new. 

I subtly offered my cheek, waiting for the rejection.

"...Okay. If that's what you want, Aoshi-kun, I'll wait." 

"...Huh?" 

Now it was my turn to be speechless. 

No, no, you shouldn't agree to that! If you're like this, you'll just get played by some bad guy and end up heartbroken.

She's a miraculously beautiful girl that every guy in the world would be after, yet her view of love is so naive. 

It's like I'm corrupting an angel who's just descended from heaven, untouched by the filth of the earth. Shaking off the guilt that started to surface, I launched a second arrow.

"Well then, how about we exchange contact info?" 

Even as I said it, I felt a chill run down my spine. Preying on someone's admiration and manipulating a girl to get what you want—isn't this the classic setup for a 'fan-eater'? I felt like I was joining the ranks of the scum crawling around this school, and it made me feel sick.

Please, don't make me do this anymore. Wake up from this dream already. Even as I wished for that, hiding behind the mask of a total sleazeball pickup artist— "Yes, let's exchange numbers." And just like that, Kisaragi dove headfirst into the wolf's den.

A new friend was added to my messaging app. Kisaragi's contact information—the one countless guys had tried to get their hands on today, but no one had succeeded. Kisaragi was clutching her phone to her chest like it was a precious treasure.

"...What's wrong, Kisaragi?" 

"I just can't believe it. It's like... I finally got the contact info of someone I've admired from afar, someone I could never reach no matter how hard I tried, you know?" 

Kisaragi took a breath, as if savoring the moment, and then looked intently into my eyes again.

"—Thank you, Aoshi-kun. I'll treasure it." 

The summer-kissed blonde, blue-eyed girl blushed and gave a shy smile. 

As her icy, emotionless facade melted away, what emerged was the gesture of a girl completely in love, an image that would be burned into my memory forever.

"Ugh, what a pain." 

Even though it was scorching hot under the glaring sun, hot enough to melt, I couldn't bring myself to move from the Bokuset seat even after Kisaragi left. 

It was a total failure. I couldn't shatter the feelings of love Kisaragi had for me.

A beeping sound came from my pocket, and I sluggishly pulled out my phone. Just as I expected, a message from Kisaragi. 

--Thanks for today! It was really fun. --And, looking forward to spending more time with you. A cute little sticker followed the simple text.

I don't want to sink to the bottom either. But if I didn't do something drastic, I felt like this relationship with Kisaragi would just keep dragging on. So, steeling myself, I typed out the absolute worst reply—one that would end everything.

--So, I've got an apartment in Shonan for when I'm staying there. 

--Why don't you come over and stay the night next time we're filming? A blatant declaration of my 'get-laid' intentions. 

The ultimate move for toxic members who are habitual 'fan-eaters' to satisfy their desires.

The message was marked as 'read,' but no reply came from Kisaragi. 

Finally, she must have realized she'd stepped on a massive landmine. I felt like my hands were dirtied once again. But surely, this was for the best.

The second shoot for the new season was tomorrow, and I was at the school grounds. 

The campus was bathed in the evening glow, and since it wasn't a filming day, none of the other members were around. 

Originally, today was my day off too, but I'd come to keep a promise with a friend.

By the way, Bokuset has dorms available for members, which are often used when arriving early or when filming runs long. However, popular members who are making good money often set up second homes near the school. 

I was also planning to head back to my apartment in Shonan after running my errands today.

But the person who asked me to come here still hasn't contacted me... Has he forgotten about our promise? As I was staring at my phone, starting to feel uneasy, a notification finally popped up. The moment I saw the message, a chill ran down my spine.

It was a message from Kisaragi. I honestly thought I'd never hear from her again.

"--I've been thinking about it a lot, you know, since then."

Thinking? About what?

"--I'm heading to Shonan now. I told Mom I was going to stay at the Bokutsu hotel, which was the plan originally, but..."

No, Kisaragi, you need to reconsider.

"--I'm going to stay at Aoshi's apartment tonight."

Seriously? Seriously, Kisaragi, isn't that taking things a bit too far?

Does she really think she can just waltz into a guy's apartment, throw on her favorite playlist, get all hyped up, and just spend the whole night playing games?

If you go along with an invitation like this from a guy, it's not a joke, you'll end up... well, things will get physical.

Please, come to your senses.

I've already gone down the wrong path; I want you to have a proper youth, for my sake.

Just then, a new message chimed in with a cute little notification sound.

This time, it wasn't from Kisaragi. It was from the very person who'd summoned me to school, even though it wasn't even a filming day.

"--Sorry to keep you waiting! You can come now, sweetie♥"

I took a deep breath to switch gears.

The reality was, Kisaragi was coming to my apartment tonight because of my own actions. Nothing I could do about that now.

So, I needed to deal with this other matter first and brace myself for the half-foreign beauty's arrival.

Walking down the hallway, I soon reached my destination: the classroom.

I knocked, and the door practically flew open as if she'd been waiting right behind it.

"Hiii~! Welcome to Ema-chan's Super-Duper Friend Hangout Room!"

"Can I turn around and go home?"

"Come on in, boys~!"

With that phrase, bubbling with extroverted energy down to her very bones, I was ushered into this "Hangout Room" of hers.

The room was spotless, with a large, comfy-looking sofa taking center stage. It definitely seemed cozy.

In the back, there was even a powder room and a shower room – handy for filming, I guessed.

My eyes landed on a fridge, and when I opened it, I found location bento boxes from a Yokohama caterer that Bokutsu often used. Their shumai bento is seriously the best in the world.

"Becoming a Bokutsu superstar gets you your own private dressing room, huh?"

"Hehe, I just sweet-talked the principal into it! It's my castle!"

Ema grinned mischievously, the kind of grin that just screams "tee-hee!"

"You know, Aoshi, you could totally get one of these too if you just asked, right?"

"Nah, I'm good. If I owe the principal a favor, who knows what he'd make me do to pay it back."

"True, true."

"Alright then, what am I doing here in your castle, Princess? Should I just kneel before your radiant beauty since I've been granted an audience?"

"Making Aoshi my knight? That's like, the ultimate honor for a girl, but maybe we should save that for another time. I asked you here for something else today, you know?"

"Oh, right, you said you wanted to talk about something about the upcoming shoots, was it?"

"Yup."

Before I even realized it, Ema had moved over to the door and locked it, a rather mischievous look on her face.

"--Now, we won't be disturbed by anyone."

"That's... ominous. Weirdly, I'm feeling a little threatened, even though I'm a guy?"

"Gender doesn't matter, does it? Guys get sexually harassed too, you know."

"Don't just assume we're heading straight into sexual harassment territory here."

"Isn't being touched by a beautiful girl supposed to be, like, a reward?"

"Ema, you're such a tease!"

Ema started waving her hands around all excitedly, and I instinctively crossed my arms over my chest to play along.

"Ahaha! Your reaction is so cute! Talking to you just gets me going, Aoshi."

"Glad to hear it. You know, you're welcome to fall head over heels for me anytime."

"Even though you'd totally freak out if I actually did."

"That's... the unspoken rule we have."

Ema, this girl I could tease and joke around with, someone who was more than a friend but not quite a girlfriend – she was truly irreplaceable to me.

"Let's sit down and chat, okay?"

Ema gestured, and we both settled onto the sofa.

I didn't even mind that our shoulders were practically touching. We were just friends, after all.

"Sorry it's not one of those super comfy, 'sink-into-oblivion' sofas."

"With a gal who's trouble for guys like me sitting right here next to me? 'Best' is the only word that comes to mind."

"Huh? Love you~"

"Your words are so cheap, though."

"Well, Ema-chan is the type who wins you over with sheer volume of charm, you know?"

Ema, who had been wearing that soft smile, started dangling her slippered foot, as if testing the waters.

"Hey, so, we've always been like, just friends, right?"

"Yeah, I guess so."

Even though we were both part of Bokutsu's "Four Heavenly Kings," Ema and I had never really done much together on the show itself.

That's why, while I definitely considered Ema a friend, I'd never really thought of her in a romantic way.

I'm confident I know she's attractive, probably more than anyone else in the world.

“But, we’re supposed to be a couple this season, right?”

“Are you worried about me as your ‘youthful romance’ partner?”

“Hmm, how do I put it?”

Ema touched her earring, the one on her small ear, as if searching for the right words—

“I think I might end up liking you too much, Aoshi, like, beyond my control.”

I was momentarily stunned, caught in Ema’s eyes, which seemed to hold rings of light.

“Look, I’m a pro. I can at least act well enough not to hold you back.”

“Aoshi, you’re Bokutsu’s top player, duh, you should be able to do that. But that’s not what I mean.”

“Then what…?”

“You know, I’m the girl in this school who’s been in love more times than anyone.”

Bokutsu’s incredible rise to become a monster hit show mirrors the very journey of Ema Shinkai becoming a legend.

Because Ema has been acting out countless romances set up by the principal, pushing her own feelings of love to their limit to do it.

“No matter how awful the guy they cast is, I always end up falling head over heels for him. My feelings are fake, yeah, but inside Bokutsu, they become real, you know?”

“Real and fake…”

I frowned at the contradiction.

“Right. When I was a kid, playing house was like, the hottest trend, you know? Aoshi, you ever play that kind of game?”

“Yeah, I have… but, what’s your point?”

“In playing house, like, leaves we find around become real money, right? But when evening comes, we just throw away those leaves we were holding so carefully and go home—that’s my youth I’m giving to Bokutsu, you know?”

“I get it.”

That explanation clicked for me.

It seemed Ema had also mastered the survival skill of making fake romantic feelings seem almost real, just like how I split my personality to do it.

But, it was clear at a glance that what this genius of youthful romance was pulling off was way more advanced and profound than my own half-baked skills.

Because when Ema gets in her zone, it’s like she channels the god of youth itself, able to play the perfect girlfriend no matter who’s beside her.

“But, playing house isn’t going to cut it this season.”

“Huh?”

“Because, like, I know so many good things about you, Aoshi, I can’t even count them all. Just being next to you like this makes my heart race—”

In the room filled with the setting sun’s glow, Ema’s profile took on a wistful hue.

As if it were a signal, our fingertips brushed lightly.

“Once filming starts, I won’t be able to stay just friends with you, Aoshi.”

I'd seen this intimate expression before, on screen, in the program—Ema had already constructed her feelings for me.

In contrast, I was overwhelmed by Ema, who had "installed" this "fake but real girlfriend" persona.

Like this, I was not good enough as a partner to play a love story with a genius of youthful romance.

“I surrender. So, what should I do? I was called here to be trained, to become a worthy partner, right?”

“You catch on quick, that’s helpful.”

Ema smiled at me in a way that was so endearing, it was worthy of being captured in a portrait.

“If you, Aoshi, are resistant to seeing me as a girlfriend, then we just need to cross that friend line today, don’t you think?”

“Cross the friend line…?”

Ema leaned even closer than before.

The romantic scent of her Anna Sui perfume filled my mind.

“Specifically?”

“Hehe, well, that would be—”

A sweet, seductive voice. Like being under a charm’s spell, I couldn’t take my eyes off her profile.

I had a premonition that in just a few seconds, our relationship would change.

“How about we chat while eating snacks and become even closer friends?”

Taken aback, a silly “Huh?” escaped my lips.

I must look like a dog who’s been denied a treat right now.

“Haaaaaaah…”

“Is it okay to let out such a big sigh?”

“Whose fault do you think it is?”

“Were you perhaps, maybe, kinda expecting a spicy development?”

“Don’t tease, don’t tease. In this situation, it’s impossible not to expect that, right?”

Seriously, this is infuriating. Who puts on victory-is-certain background music and then ends up losing?

“Candy, do you have a preference for what flavor?”

“At this point, anything is fine.”

“Okay, then I’ll give you my favorite. Aoshi, look over here?”

“Huh? What is i—”

—Chu.

A pure white spark exploded in my head.

I thought a fragrant breeze had blown by, and then the plaid pattern of her recklessly short pleated skirt was burned into my eyes—and before I knew it, my lips were enveloped in a soft sensation.

The sun was setting on the horizon, in the twilight hour when you’re not sure whether to turn on the lights—stealing moments from the eyes of the world, I was kissing Ema.

Ema grabbed my shoulders and leaned into me.

Yet, I couldn’t do anything clever, my fingers just trembled with waves of pleasure.

“Mnn—”

Just as I heard Ema’s enchanting voice, something invaded my mouth.

It wasn’t a tongue—a sweet flavor wafted up, pleasantly tickling my nose.

Leaving behind a faint lip noise, her hot lips reluctantly parted.

In my dumbfounded mouth, a candy rolled around.

My first kiss with Ema tasted like honey lemon.

“—With this, we’re not just friends anymore.”

Before my eyes, the charismatic gal who captivated men across the nation was wearing a dazed smile right after the kiss.

At that fact, I felt an indescribable sense of superiority and excitement.

“Next time, if Haruma gets ahead of us with a two-shot, I’ll cast a ‘you’ll explode’ curse on him.”

“……Yeah, I have a feeling that’s going to happen.”

I felt Ema Shinkai, the girl, being planted inside me and growing bigger.

My instincts were nagging me for more skinship with Ema.

“Candy, was it yummy-yummy?”

“……Sorry, it might be a bit too sweet for me.”

“Huh? If you don’t like it, it’s okay to spit it out, you know?”

“No, I’m not one to waste food.”

The next moment, I stole a kiss from Ema’s completely unguarded lips.

At zero distance, I could hear Ema’s muffled voice.

The moment our lips overlapped, as if in some ritual, I slowly transferred the candy from my mouth to hers, mouth-to-mouth.

Enjoying the precariousness of the candy, sandwiched between our lips, as if it might fall at any moment.

The sweetness of the candy messily smeared around our mouths.

Finding the same spark of delight in the depths of her eyes, I felt a thrill of euphoria, as if I had obtained everything from the girl in front of me.

I put my hand around Ema’s waist, pulling her body tightly against mine, and pushed my lips open, pushing the candy deeper into her mouth.

Ema also lost her composure, unable to suppress her voice, which was mixed with a sweet cry.

“Mnn…!! Haa…!!”

It felt like a very seductive act. Like I was indulging in a forbidden game with Ema.

When we broke apart for air, Ema’s melted face was reflected in my eyes.

Her tilted uniform ribbon, the necklace peeking out from her collar—and the fullness of her chest, adorned by these, rose and fell at a faster rhythm than usual.

“If we lick it together, it’ll be gone in no time, right?”

“It’s funny how our candy preferences are totally different, but our kissing preferences are the same.”

“Did you not like it?”

“No, I want to do it more. I still have candy left in my mouth, you know?”

Ema, smiling seductively, didn’t even bother to fix her flipped-up skirt, and closed her eyes in my arms, as if begging for more.

Like a dog who can’t wait for a treat, I succumbed to this most luxurious temptation.

Forgetting even to breathe, I shared a deep kiss with Ema.

Our tongues intertwined countless times, coated in a syrupy, honey lemon flavor.

As if melted by our heat, the candy had disappeared before we knew it.

But such trivialities didn’t matter. There was no stopping now.

I just wanted to taste more of Ema, this exquisite girl.

As if God had thoughtfully drawn the curtains, the sounds of rustling clothes and lip smacking echoed in the dimly lit room.

A kiss that was devoid of any semblance of high school innocence, a beast-like kiss only to satisfy base desires.

Neither Ema nor I knew innocent kisses like ordinary teenagers do.

Because we had sold off our first loves and first kisses, our youth, in this school where youth had died.

But even while despairing at relationships full of lies, it’s not like we didn’t want to connect with others.

Wrapped in Ema’s body temperature, I realized how parched my heart had been.

I realized that I had been going crazy wanting someone to be with me.

That’s why, in this school saturated with lies, we found someone we could open our hearts to, and mingled together, melting our similar shaped loneliness.

Having continued to distort ourselves to survive in Bokutsu, and eventually becoming beasts of youth, this was the only way we could comfort the emptiness that had taken root in our bodies.

Impure, twisted, and scorned by the world—this was the reality, like a ten-yen coin, left in our hands after almost everything teenage-like had been taken away.

“I’ve decided. Let’s make this season an unforgettable summer, okay?”

“Yeah, if that’s what you want, Ema.”

To the voice whispered in my ear, I answered while stroking Ema’s hair.

I didn’t know where this incoherent relationship was headed.

I wasn’t even sure if we could reach anywhere.

On this day, Ema and I were tied together with a ribbon of false love, in a butterfly knot that could come undone at any time.

“Ah~, man, that was so refreshing!”

At the front entrance, Ema tapped the toes of her platform sneakers on the ground.

“As expected, flirting with a good-looking guy is the best stress relief.”

“Don’t say such indecent things out loud.”

“I wonder if I’ll feel like this too when I leave a spicy hotel? What do you think?”

“Were you even listening to me?”

Her hair, with inner highlights, danced in the wind, and Ema still turned her sparkling eyes towards me.

“……Don’t ask me. I’m a minor just like you.”

“Ehh, that’s weird. I heard from the male members that Aoshi, the womanizer, lives in a love hotel and calls a different girl every night.”

“Hey, hold on. Tell me their names right now.”

Making dimples appear under her cheeks, Ema smiled endearingly.

“But, Aoshi is a gentleman, isn’t he? Just now, even though you had free rein to touch Ema-chan’s this and that, you didn’t lay a hand on me.”

“My mom’s hobby is going around to tableware stores. She taught me, no matter how beautiful you think something is, don’t touch the merchandise.”

“You’re so good at following Mama’s rules, good job.”

“……By the way, was touching okay?”

Even over her loosely worn summer uniform, I could sense Ema’s style, which was beyond that of a high school student, and I almost regretted my restraint.

“Secret~♥”

“Ehh, tell me~”

Exchanging playful banter, we started walking side by side.

From the approach leading to the school gate, we could overlook the impressive grounds.

There were no club activities at this school, so there wasn’t a soul around.

However, we did see a few members whose commute time overlapped with ours.

Ema, who was well-connected and a social butterfly, called out to almost all of them.

“Bye-bye, P! Bye-bye to you too, P over there!”

“Hey, what’s with the ‘P’?”

Unable to resist my curiosity, I asked.

“When you say ‘P’, isn’t it obviously short for ‘Kare-P’ (boyfriend-P)?”

“Oh, I see. It means guys you’ve been involved with in Bokutsu, huh.”

“Yup. It’s like a super diluted version of ex-boyfriends, maybe? Dunno.”

“So, soon, I’ll be joining the ranks of the ‘P’s, then.”

“No, no, Aoshi is Aoshi, you know?”

Ema said it as if explaining a simple formula, making me blink in surprise.

“Actually, the guys I call ‘P’, I don’t even remember their names anymore, you know? Even though I’m supposed to have held hands with them during filming before. That’s why ‘P’—it’s convenient, and guys seem happy to be seen as ex-boyfriends, and the world keeps turning smoothly today.”

“Being a genius of youthful romance must be tough.”

“But, Aoshi’s name is properly in my memory, you know. Among all the guys who are a dime a dozen, Aoshi is special, you know?”

Those words were pleasing, but thinking about Ema, who was being forced to do something unnatural as a human, made me feel complicated, and I couldn’t find words to respond immediately.

“You probably say the same thing to Haruma too, right?”

"You're just being a typical sulky guy," Ema teased. "Come on, cheer up, you get to monopolize Ema-chan on the way home, you know? Aoshi, chuu-chuuki~!"

Ema uttered those cutesy lines, the kind that would make you cringe if you heard them from any other girl, but she delivered them so naturally, it felt like it was a talent unique to her. She then playfully clung to my arm.

Yes, for some reason, I had ended up with this routine of walking home with Ema, something every guy would envy.

"I'm such a lucky guy," I said.

"Your delivery is way too flat!"

Once we were outside the school gates, we promptly put on our masks. I also pulled my cap down low.

To put it dramatically, our faces were known all over Japan, so getting recognized would be a major problem.

Avoiding attention, we got into the taxi I had called to wait in front of the school.

We set off towards Hiratsuka, and after about twenty minutes of being jostled in the car, we arrived at the station.

The symbolic towerマンション that immediately jumped into view as we got out of the car—that was the place Ema was renting for her stay in Shonan.

The location was great, and the rent must be astronomical, but with Ema's Bokutsu dream come true, her financial power meant it was probably no big deal.

"Thanks, Aoshi. You can drop me off here."

"Okay. But be careful, alright? You're way too famous, no matter how careful you are, it's never enough."

"Aoshi, you're such a worrywart! But, I'm just plain happy you're worried about me, someone you like."

As she said that, Ema suddenly took off her mask.

Her now-exposed mouth looked like a cat that had just thought up some mischief.

However, I couldn't quite grasp the extent of her scheme—even when she kissed me through my mask, all I could do was stand there dumbfounded.

"A reward for your knightly escort service. Is this enough?"

"It's practically overpaying me in tips. Let me treat you to lunch next time."

"Not forgetting to set up the next date already, as expected of the nation's heartthrob. Is Ema-chan being targeted now?"

"Next time, my goal is to escort you right to your front door. And then, finally, to your bedroom."

"Ahaha. I'll think about it."

Ema seemed to like my joke and gave me a top-notch wink.

"See ya, see you at the shoot."

"Yeah, see ya."

Ema waved her hand innocently and ran towards the apartment building.

I did think I was being overly protective, but I watched her figure until she disappeared inside.

Then, as if switching places with Ema, someone emerged from the entrance.

At first glance, just an ordinary middle-aged man.

I didn't know if it was a premonition or a gut feeling—but something intuitive made me unable to take my eyes off that person.

As he reached a landscaped open space often seen in luxury apartments, another man appeared from the shadows.

The two of them melted into the trees and started talking in hushed tones. They didn't seem like friends.

As if commanded by instinct, I took out my phone and photographed the scene.

Then, I slipped my phone back into my pocket and left the apartment complex.

I got into a taxi and headed towards the town where I lived.

I asked to be dropped off in front of the station because I remembered I had a guest coming over tonight.

Concealing my face, I entered a sweets shop.

I ordered two cakes, and I thought I saw the female shop assistant giggle when she looked at my face.

For a moment, I broke out in a cold sweat, thinking I'd been recognized, but that didn't seem to be the case—I was able to leave the store without incident, cake box in hand, tilting my head in confusion.

But, I didn't dwell on it too much and started heading home.

Just as the streetlights began to flicker on, the high-rise apartment building came into view.

It wasn't as extravagant as Ema's place, but it was still a luxurious property, and its foolproof security was the deciding factor for me, a somewhat-famous person, to choose it as my second home.

I passed through the entrance using fingerprint authentication and inserted my key into my apartment door.

But, there was no need to turn it.

"—Welcome home, Ao-kun. You're late," Asuka said, coming out to greet me.

"I'm home. Sorry to keep you waiting. I got you a souvenir."

"Ah—"

Asuka saw the cake box I was holding and let out a sound as if she had realized something.

Then, she pointed to her own mouth with her finger.

—Mask...?

Looking at the mask I had taken off, there was a clear kiss mark on it.

The color of the lipstick told me who was responsible. In my mind, the genius of youthful romance was smirking mischievously.

No wonder the shop assistant laughed! How embarrassing!

No, that's not what I should be worried about right now.

If I, with just the lipstick color, could tell it was Ema, there's no way her best friend wouldn't catch on.

"Hmm. So you were with Ema, that's why you're late."

"Well, Asuka? This is, uh..."

Asuka's eyes, usually embodying the word 'pure', narrowed like a waning moon, now exuding an overwhelming aura of 'woman'.

"—Looks like I'll have to give you a stern punishment then."

Unfortunately, I wasn't given a chance to explain myself.

Asuka pulled me by the hand right there in the entryway, leading me straight into the bedroom.

"Ao-kun, lie down."

"O-okay, okay, just calm down a bit. I'm not going anywhere."

As told, I lay down on the bed and raised both hands as a sign of submission.

Seeing that, Asuka seemed to regain some composure.

"I'm sorry. Waiting for you at home just made me miss you so much, Ao-kun..."

"It's okay. It's my fault for making you feel lonely, Asuka."

I placed my hand over Asuka's hand, as if to reassure her.

Asuka's palm was cool and pleasant to the touch.

"You can do whatever you want with me now, Asuka."

"Ao-kun..."

Asuka's long, lush eyelashes fluttered as if deeply moved.

And then, in the next moment, she enveloped her adorable face with a captivating allure.

"Then, I won't hold back—"

Asuka climbed onto the bed, snuggling up to me in a pose like a female leopard.

Her dazzling beauty was so close, I could almost feel her breath.

The combination of her pure-looking school uniform and a man's bedroom created a forbidden contrast, and a damp sense of anticipation swelled in my chest.

Then, Asuka, now kneeling, straddled my waist.

I understood how indecent this position was.

But, there was no hesitation between us—because we had done this many times before.

Asuka's slender fingers deftly loosened my tie with practiced movements.

"Wait, hold on. Now that I think about it, I haven't showered yet..."

"Ao-kun. I don't think I can wait even one more second."

"Okay. If you don't mind, Asuka."

Soon, Asuka's hands had taken off my dress shirt.

"Here, Ao-kun, you take mine off too."

"As you wish, Princess."

Still lying on my back, I reached for her pristine blouse.

Asuka swept her long black hair behind her, impatiently waiting for my fingers to reach her.

I opened the buttons of her blouse—her décolletage, so white it looked almost pale under the light, was revealed.

I opened the buttons of her blouse—her slender frame revealed unexpectedly voluptuous breasts.

I opened the buttons of her blouse—lacy black lingerie, a far cry from Asuka's clean image, stimulated my base desires.

Each time Asuka's clothing opened, a bewitching scene unfolded.

The beautiful girl who was supposed to be the icon of purity at school was now revealing her seductive self before me.

"Do you prefer the ribbon on, or off?"

"Don't treat me like a pervert."

"Really? Then, I'll take it off?"

"Please leave it on."

"How obedient."

Asuka chuckled in amusement, but she adjusted the position of the ribbon so it was more visible.

Asuka, who accepted a man's preferences with an angelic smile, was the epitome of a good woman, I thought.

"Hey, don't tease me."

"Think about it, Asuka. Faced with a nude woman, only a painter can do their best work. Asking that of a mere high school student is too cruel an order."

Though I spoke bravely, my hands were so useless they couldn't even unbutton another button.

Of course they were. My vision was completely filled with her perfectly shaped, bowl-like breasts and Asuka's yearning face.

There was no way I could take my eyes off such a heavenly sight, not even for a moment.

"Please. Hurry. I can't take it anymore..."

"Wait. Just a little more—"

I struggled with the third button from the bottom of her blouse.

Just a little more, and her world's cutest navel would peek out.

And then, from Asuka's increasingly seductive expression, I sensed—it was time out.

In the next moment, Asuka threw away all reason and leaned over me as if abandoning herself.

And then, like a spoiled kitten, she nuzzled her cheek against my face, expressing her affection.

The moment Asuka's lips traced down my neck, pleasure almost made my hips lift off the bed.

"It's a little salty, maybe."

"Don't say that. It's embarrassing."

"What if it becomes a habit?"

She laughed jokingly for a fleeting moment, then immediately returned to what she had been doing.

As my collarbone was affectionately licked, and the warm, wriggling tip of her tongue reached my shoulder—

Suddenly, a burning pain assaulted me.

Asuka, like a starved beast, had sunk her teeth into me.

It was the pain I had wished for.

For us, who had become irrevocably tainted that day, it was a ritual of atonement—I gently stroked Asuka's head as she bit into me with single-minded focus.

Please, until you're satisfied, punish the man who put you through such a terrible ordeal.

Fudo Aoshi, who made the foolish choice to exchange the first love that should have been fulfilled for money.

It was a few days after I had rejected Asuka's confession on Bokutsu Seat.

I had come to the depths of Enoshima—to a place called Lover's Hill.

I slumped onto a bench I found, as if throwing my heavy body down.

Perhaps because of the light rain, there were no tourists in the forest clearing.

Still, occasionally, couples sharing umbrellas passed by.

Further ahead was the "Dragon Love Bell," and they must have come aiming for that.

A romance spot where, if you hang a padlock with a message on the wire mesh and ring the bell together, eternal love is granted—it had been featured in anime and movies, so even if you didn't know Enoshima, many people knew of the Dragon Love Bell itself.

I pulled up the hood of the hoodie I wore under my uniform to shelter from the rain.

The season was late summer, with the footsteps of autumn beginning to be heard.

It was too chilly for swimming, and the autumn leaves were still far off—arguably one of the seasons when tourists stayed away from Kamakura and Enoshima the most.

As time passed idly, I picked up my phone.

When I searched for "Fudo Aoshi," an overwhelming number of search results popped up.

Bokutsu fans on social media were still buzzing about the latest episode that had been released just the other day.

Clips of the moment I turned down Asuka were endlessly uploaded, and everyone was calling it a legendary episode. The unstoppable frenzy felt almost religious.

A night after the episode aired—I had been coaxed by adults to hurt a girl, and in doing so, I had risen to become a Bokutsu superstar.

Suddenly, my phone vibrated.

—I'll be there soon.

The sender of the message was Asuka.

After we broke up on Bokutsu Seat, I had lost contact with Asuka.

Yet, last night, she suddenly messaged me, "I want to meet and talk."

I couldn't refuse. Even if it meant enduring the irony of her designating a couples' sanctuary as our meeting place after breaking up.

Soon, a shadowy figure appeared from the forest path, concealing their face.

When she took off her cap and mask, the girl I had truly fallen in love with was there.

"Asuka..."

"Sorry for calling you out so suddenly. There's something I really need to tell you—"

Amidst anxiety and tension, I wondered what I wanted Asuka to say to me.

And then, I clearly realized—I was here because I wanted a clear period to be put on our relationship, which should have been a mutual love that had gone awry.

So, please, deliver the final blow with your own hands.

"After we broke up, I tried to give up on you, Ao-kun, but I couldn't."

...Asuka, what are you saying?

Large dark circles were visible under her eyes, and she looked quite unstable, but the light of will flickering in her eyes was genuine.

"I still love you, Ao-kun. I love you, love you, love you, love you so much. I don't want to give you to anyone. I want you to be mine and mine alone, and I want to be yours and yours alone."

My heart, which had been hoping for a typical first-love ending, lost its footing and fell away.

Maybe, it would be better if we never met again.

Otherwise, we would just become endlessly dependent on each other and fall into ruin.

But, many times stronger than that self-control, what burned into my heart was joy.

At the fact that I had driven a pure and lovely girl to madness, I felt a gruesome pleasure.

The girl in front of me now was a pitiful maiden, caught in the curse of first love and broken.

And, I was already broken too.

Even though I had caused such an ending, and even though just seconds ago I had hoped for a cheap romance-drama-like farewell, I was now desperately wanting to embrace Asuka's body, shivering in the light rain.

"How about you, Ao-kun? Do you still love me?"

"—Yeah, even now, I love Asuka."

I confessed my honest feelings.

The moment my words reached her, Asuka wore a smile that was somehow unfocused, as if the world had just been saved for her.

"I'm so happy. I'm so, so happy, Ao-kun."

Waves of pleasure seeped under her skirt, and I could feel Asuka's body trembling with chills.

"Then, will you take responsibility? For tainting me, for making my body so indecent?"

I steeled myself—I steeled myself to jump into the wicked cave, like a somewhat sensual carnivorous plant, spreading its mouth wide open.

Suddenly, an old movie came to mind.

If I remembered correctly, it was about a doctor who, after losing his beloved, desperately tried to bring her back to life, secretly keeping her corpse at home while engrossed in research.

The ending of the story was utterly tragic. Love, and love alone, led him to his death.

I thought it was similar—to me and Asuka, who had made the insane choice to continue a first love that had already died.

In the end, I couldn't become the ideal boyfriend for Asuka.

Then, at least—

"From today on, I am Asuka's slave."

Hearing the words of our vow, Asuka threw away the mask of purity that had become her public image and split her mouth into a grin like a beast.

"From now on, let's love each other until we're covered in blood, in a place where no one can see us."

At that moment, the sound of a bell rang—the sound of the Dragon Love Bell.

I felt like I understood why Asuka had wanted to meet again at this place.

I remembered that it had become a tradition for couples who successfully confessed on Bokutsu Seat to ring the Dragon Love Bell to make their summer romance eternal.

Asuka was listening intently to the resounding bell, as if imprinting the sound into her five senses.

Looking at her earnest figure any longer felt like it would crush my heart, so I, the cunning one, pretended to focus on the sound and closed my eyes.

On this day, Asuka and I brought the frayed ends of our first love together, and they were tied together like a knot that could never be undone.

A searing pain jolted me back to reality.

The beautiful girl from my memories was sinking her teeth into my shoulder.

It was probably about time. I braced myself, and pushed down Asuka, who was straddling me.

"—Kyaa!"

A delicate, girly shriek that tickled a man's sadistic desires rose up.

Between my hands on the bed was Asuka's face, unbelievably small.

At first, she looked surprised, but soon, she wore an all-encompassing smile.

That was her secret sign that meant, "Do whatever you want."

I didn't bother with the blouse buttons I had half-undone. I wouldn't even try to take off her skirt.

Screw that—right now, I wanted to do it with Asuka as quickly as possible.

Driven by desire, I bit down on her neck, where pale veins were visible.

The moment I did, Asuka cried out in ecstasy.

"Ahh...!! Ao-kun...!!"

Seeing the tooth marks left on her pure white skin, I was filled with a sense of dominance.

Leaving bite marks on each other's necks had become a ritual of mourning for us, who had failed to fulfill our first love.

Asuka lovingly touched the teeth marks engraved on my neck.

"While these marks are here, I can feel reassured that Ao-kun belongs to me."

"I'm always yours, Asuka."

"Words aren't enough. Prove it properly."

Asuka closed her eyelids as if dreaming.

I stole a kiss from her lips, which were half-open as if inviting me.

As if eagerly awaiting this moment, heated tongue and tongue intertwined.

I surrendered myself to the pleasure that felt like it would melt all the bones in my body, turning me into liquid.

Asuka devotedly offered her soft lips and tongue, responding to my devouring kisses. Wanting to feel my beloved in my palms, I stroked her smooth black hair.

The scent of makeup base rising from her bare skin, the perfume of Jill Stuart she had put on her neck, the rhythm of breaths between kisses—everything was different, and I became aware that I was indulging in carnal pleasure with a girl who was not Ema.

"—Am I better than Ema?"

"……Yeah."

I answered as if surrendering to her words, which seemed to see through a man's ulterior motives, yet also faintly reproached me.

Asuka seemed deeply satisfied.

"Hehe. I know the number of moles in your embarrassing places, and even your kissing hotspots, you know."

"I'm completely naked in front of you, Asuka."

"I'm practically naked in front of you right now too, you know?"

Asuka's disheveled uniform revealed glimpses of her bra and shorts—a sight that was far too stimulating.

"Hey, Miss Purity."

"The only reason I can pretend to be pure at school is because I detoxify myself here. The real Asuka Kurashina is an impure, indecent girl, you know. So, you know—"

Asuka, revealing her true nature, blushed and smiled bewitchingly, like a queen ruling the night.

"—Let's do even naughtier things, shall we?"

There was no way to resist such brain-melting sorcery.

Lascivious breaths echoed in the密室.

Forgetting all bothersome things, we indulged in carnal desire.

Before we knew it, both Asuka and I were only in our underwear.

How long had we spent in this kaleidoscopic, sensual time—soaked in sweat after finishing our act, we listened to the sound of the air conditioner running in a daze.

"……Can I say what I was thinking?"

"I think I'm thinking the same thing."

"Shall we say it at the same time, on the count of three?"

"Yeah, okay."

We timed it together—

"I think our physical compatibility is amazing." "Our physical compatibility is perfect, isn't it?"

We could only keep a serious expression for a moment before we burst out laughing, as if our sensitive spots had been tickled.

When I let my arm drop, Asuka naturally used it as a pillow.

She snuggled close to me as if wanting to be spoiled, looking into my eyes and tightly gripping my other hand.

I didn't know any gestures from a cute girl more adorable than this.

Everything I knew about girls—that they could be as harmless and sweet as sugar candy, and that they could sometimes transform into beings so terrifying they could freeze your blood—I had learned it all from Asuka.

"I'm looking forward to the night we become real lovers. I might not be able to stand up, you know."

"Will you wait until we finish playing out the Bokutsu script?"

That day, when we heard the sound of the Dragon Love Bell together, I made several promises with Asuka.

Even after our relationship on Bokutsu ended, we would continue to perform our secret rituals in secret. If I graduated from Bokutsu without ending up with anyone, I would officially become Asuka's lover.

And, until we reached that anniversary, we would not progress to acts beyond our rituals.

"This season, I'll be playing lovers with Ema, so I think it'll make you anxious."

"I'll allow you to cheat with Ema. She's the one who knows the lies of Bokutsu better than anyone. I'm sure she'll return you to me."

Nodding, my eyes went to the tooth marks engraved on Asuka's shoulder.

"Sorry. I might have used too much force."

"Don't worry about it. I was happy that you desired me so strongly."

"Even so, if the marks are still there, it'll affect your work, right?"

Asuka, having become less actively involved in Bokutsu, was focusing her energy on outside work.

Just recently, she had graced the pages of a weekly少年 magazine's [Shonen - boys'] photo spread.

"What if you get caught on camera in your modeling or other work with these marks?"

"Ao-kun, you know how amazing editing technology is these days, right?"

"No, I don't want to hear about it. It'll ruin my pure young boy's heart, and I won't be able to look at your photoshoots anymore."

"I don't think truly innocent boys would be looking at photos of high school girls in swimsuits in the first place, but—are you disappointed in my body, now that it's not just for photoshoots?"

"Of course not."

I took my time observing Asuka in her lingerie. It was a supreme luxury for a man.

Her elegantly long limbs, her flawlessly slender waist, her sinful figure that captivated men's eyes despite her supposed image of purity—the body that was like a mass of aphrodisiac, just as I had seen in the photoshoots, lay there before me.

"It's just, I wanted the shape of Asuka's navel to be a secret of the world that only I knew."

"But, you're the only one in the whole world who gets to poke it, right?"

"Seriously, are you a genius?"

Asuka Kurashina, with her pure and lovely appearance, was frustratingly a genius at manipulating men at heart.

I was plotting to turn the tables by tickling her navel when the doorbell rang.

Pulled back to reality at once, I felt a heavy sigh escape me.

"A visitor?"

"...Looks like it."

I quickly headed to the living room and stopped in front of the intercom with a monitor.

Pressing the call button, I heard the voice of the resident concierge.

"Mr. Fudo, you have a visitor who says they are an acquaintance from school. They say you have an appointment to meet this evening."

"Yes, that's correct. Please let them through."

"Who is it?"

As soon as I hung up, Asuka, wearing my dress shirt, came into the living room.

"Asuka, please don't say anything, but could you answer the intercom when it rings?"

"Huh? But, I'm dressed in a way I can't really be seen by people, though?"

"That's exactly why. Please, Asuka."

Asuka was hesitant at first, but when I bowed my head, she agreed, saying, "If Ao-kun says so much."

Soon, I began to imagine the person who would be visiting this room.

Around now, she was probably getting into the elevator—her beautiful blonde hair flowing.

Before long, the intercom rang.

Asuka glanced at me from the entrance. When I nodded, she unlocked the door in her light clothing—

And opened it.

"Good evening, Aoshi-kun. I brought a souvenir for you—"

The clear soprano voice abruptly stopped.

What I heard next was a terribly strained voice.

"K-Kurashina, Asuka-san...? But, why...?"

"Kisaragi-san...? Ahahaha, good evening..."

Even Asuka, for all her poise, couldn't continue the conversation any further.

Seizing the moment, I also went to the entrance.

Kisaragi's lost, weak gaze immediately shot towards me.

Kisaragi was likely in the process of understanding the cruel reality, piece by piece.

The person who answered the intercom was Asuka in lingerie, and then me, awkwardly showing my face—what assembled in Kisaragi's trembling hands was a filthy bomb that would shatter her pure love into smithereens.

Another first love breathed its last in this world.

Letting out a sound that was not quite a voice, Kisaragi burst into tears and ran off.

—Sorry, Kisaragi. Don't waste your time on foolish guys from now on.

I don't expect you to understand. But, this is a necessary rite of passage.

"Hmm. Could it be that I'm being made out to be the bad guy?"

"Seriously, I'm so sorry. But, I couldn't think of any other way for Kisaragi to give up."

"Kisaragi-san was one of Ao-kun's 'push-for' members, wasn't she?"

Asuka readily showed understanding to my words.

Asuka was also one of the superstars Bokutsu had created.

Naturally, she must have encountered 'push-for' members who came to Bokutsu aiming for Asuka, and must have learned how to handle them skillfully.

"Too bad for you. Just until a moment ago, you had the right to see a beautiful girl who's the center of attention at school, completely naked."

"Fan service is a no-go, right? Besides, one beautiful girl I can see naked, Asuka, is more than enough."

"I don't remember being undressed any further by you, though?"

In her suggestive lingerie, Asuka struck a provocative pose.

"Please, just keep the promise we made about not doing 'that' before we become lovers."

"Hehe, I'm relieved. I was wondering if you'd gotten tired of me, since you never make a move."

"Don't joke around. I'm planning to study how to unhook a bra with Asuka. Please be gentle with me when that time comes."

"Ao-kun, you're like the king of virgins, aren't you?"

"I have no intention of becoming the leader of a country that's likely to be the first to perish due to a declining birthrate."

"Sorry. You looked like you were in pain, so I wanted to make you laugh."

Saying that, Asuka snuggled close to me.

My heart, which couldn't warm itself alone, was enveloped in a gentle warmth.

"It's painful, isn't it? Not being able to reciprocate the feelings of someone who genuinely cares about you."

Kisaragi's tear-streaked face had been stuck in my head the whole time, making me unable to speak—how many times would I need to be saved by Asuka?

"……I'm completely useless without Asuka."

"You have to make sure you don't let such a great girlfriend get away."

While playfully overlapping our bare skin, Asuka smiled at me with overflowing charm.

"Hey, do you like me?"

"Yeah, I love you."

"That's always your answer, isn't it."

It can't be helped. I don't know how the world distinguishes between them, but in my mind, there's a clear line between "like" and "love."

"Like" is, I think, an emotion where admiration bursts out like a freshly opened soda. Dazzled by the sparkling light, you're drawn to someone without even noticing their flaws.

In contrast, "love," I think, is about having the resolve to stay by someone's side even after seeing their blemishes up close, so close you can't look away.

That's why, I like Ema, but I love Asuka.

The mood had become nice, so I placed my finger on Asuka's delicate chin.

I was about to lean in for a kiss, but Asuka turned her face away with a pout.

"Mom taught me not to believe 'I love you' from a man's mouth. She said to properly check for proof."

"Earlier, I bought a cake from your favorite shop. And in the fridge, I've stocked Yakult 1000, which you drink every day without fail. You'll be staying over for a while, right?"

During filming periods, Asuka always stays at my apartment, without exception.

That's why we go to school together every morning.

"Pass. Here's a perfect score."

Along with those words, an exceptionally sweet kiss was bestowed upon me.

Having received my master's permission, I eagerly devoured Asuka's flavor.

Not satisfied with just that, I wrapped my arms around Asuka's waist and lifted her up.

My arms touched her buttocks, adorned in black shorts, and I could savor their softness.

I laid Asuka down on the kitchen counter, seeing an expression on her face that held a hint of expectation.

Her skin, whiter and clearer than artificial marble, was dazzling to my eyes.

As if releasing my desires, I nestled my cheek against her full breasts.

Asuka, feeling it, let out a hot sigh.

I wanted to forget everything bothersome and just melt into the night with Asuka, but worldly thoughts wouldn't leave my head.

How did Kisaragi feel, seeing me living such a debauched life, unbecoming of a high school student?

No matter the reasons, I had kissed two girls in one day.

It was the lowest, most insincere behavior.

But, neither Asuka nor Ema would condemn me.

Because the relationships we had formed inherently didn't draw a triangle.

In the Bokutsu world bathed in daylight, I would play lovers with Ema, and in private, hidden by the veil of night, I would love Asuka—as long as our relationships stayed within their respective domains, they would draw parallel lines that would never intersect.

Therefore, this impure relationship diagram was allowed to continue eternally, as long as the three of us wished for it.

To enjoy a refreshing youth, like a seagull dancing in the blue sky, was a pipe dream. I could never become the protagonist of an idealized high school romance comedy.

Like butterfly specimens with beautiful wings pinned down, our youth couldn't flutter anywhere. Until we were tired of and discarded, we were just beings meant to comfort the eyes of many.

After graduating from Bokutsu, both Asuka and I were set to enter the entertainment industry.

Once we earned enough money not to struggle, maybe Asuka and I could live together somewhere quiet.

For now, that alone was my emotional support, as I continued to live through this hell of youth.